My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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