if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
