she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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