No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
