called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize