i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize