We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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