was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
