:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
