i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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