Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
