But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize