loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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