best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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