ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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