We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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