also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Randomize
