Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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