Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
