Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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