I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize
