as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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