I'm drive I can fine osifer
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Randomize
