You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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