It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
