Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
He told me they were just razor bumps!
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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