the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize