He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Well I just put wine in my tea
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
