so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
A+ Viking dick
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
