No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
