u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
