I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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