too bad you live with your parents still
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
