i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
