NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
