I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
