how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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