Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Randomize