i love accidental penises.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
