That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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