pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
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