was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
