Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize