Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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