PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
