dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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