My nipple is on Facebook.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I AM VODKA MAN
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
