we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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