I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
