i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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